Thursday, May 17, 2007

The World Through Google's Eyes

Google, in less than a decade has beaten the hell out of its competition in the search space. First it pushed Inktomi out of the Yahoo backfill deal and then slowly proceeded to castrate AltaVista, Excite, Infoseek (now Go), Yahoo (back stabbers) and MSN.

So how did they do it? Some would say higher quality search results, and back in the old days that may have been true. Larry and Sergey were some smart cookies, and developed an interesting new spin on ranking search. Off page criteria burst onto the scene and Google, with its simple, clean user interface quickly pushed the portals out of the sandbox, but what about today? Is Google still king of relevance?

No.

Let's look at the world through Google's eyes. The best way to do that is by looking at the searches visitors to this blog used to find it on Google. This should tell us what Google thinks this site is about, right? At the very least it could prove mildly amusing to see what people actually search for online...

Remember, these are the actual searches that sent recent visitors to Penis Hero.

Google searches (two AOL powered by Google searches included):

12 year old buttholes
imaraginglesbian
AmyBeloved
buttholes
buttholes
botnet
buttholes
buttholes
buttholes
Januvia
buttholes
januvia
buttholes
januvia glucose days wash out
buttholes

Okay, so I blogged about the botnet asshats who shut down my DNS provider and used that apparently hugely popular word in the blog title, and I've blogged about Januvia as well, but by these results it looks like Google is seeing the world through brown stained glasses. In Google's eyes this site is almost entirely about buttholes (probably even more so after this entry goes live).

I'm not sure these results are in keeping with Google's early search relevance dominance. Remember, they became king of a tribe of mega-tech, dot com giants in the search space, literally crushing 800 lb gorillas under their geeky boots because they returned relevant results without a lot of fluff. Today they're no longer all about search, and to be honest, the results have suffered. Five years ago the referring searches to this page would've been more relevant. Google is slipping and the door is open for the next pair of college kids to come along and slam it in the big G's face.

In fairness, Yahoo isn't doing much better, but at least they mostly caught on to a more relevant body part...

Yahoo searches:

fatso penis
penis sound insertion
suck press penis
big black buttholes

Call this a stupid, pointless exercise, say there's no SEO relevance whatsoever, call me a heretic for being critical of G, but I say that Yahoo just beat the pants off of Google for relevant results... Well, sorta'...

Digg!

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