Penis Hero

Lately I've been dicking around playing MafiaPayDay. It's a basic multi-player mafia roleplaying game that's not half bad. It's not terribly exciting on the surface, but once you start to understand the guts of the game it can be pretty addictive.

The ghist of it is this: you're a mobster. You start out as a low-level mob soldier, but do your jobs, build respect and hold your points and you can rise up the ranks. It's a solo game, with MMO aspirations, but the reality on both fronts is that your family is what ends up mattering most.

There's a lot of family play built in, but not so much that you can't fly solo if you want to. I doubt it's as much fun without the family element, but the option is there.

It's also one of those free games with the option to invest further into your character. I have yet to buy in, but I have pocketed a little cash. I guess I forgot to mention that the idea behind MafiaPayDay is that you earn cash for knocking off a Don, real cash. I've only killed one Don in the game so far, but a free game that pays cash is cool, even if the cash isn't easy to earn.

For new players, here are a few tips:

1. If you're going to pay dues, pay them before you do any jobs. It will save you points.

2. Do your daily jobs, petty crimes, family jobs and city bank robbing every day.

3. Click "Protection" on the left nav. Buy bodyguards when you can. You might be more anxious to wack another player, but check out the power of some of the weapons, and their costs. It isn't expensive to blow through 50k in protection with a big enough gun.

4. Beats and wacks are based on points in your wallet vs. the victims points plus their protection.

5. Lottery - look at the pot-odds. Play whenever you like, but look at the pot-odds to see when it's smart to play. Essentially, if the stated odds are 1 in 10 with a $10 buy-in, a ticket on any pot over $100 is a good buy. I use the "$" but it's all fictional points (except for the Don pot payout).

6. Grave robbing - use a shovel. If you wack someone, always grave rob with a shovel. If you don't wack someone, click through the obits and buy information on victim's points. If they're 100, grave dig with a shovel.

Fuck, I can't really write all there is to write. Go play MafiaPayDay and come back here and finish the how-to for me. I'm that damn lazy...

This election and pending innauguration has seen more hype and fanfare than any in my lifetime. There's even a Barack Obama coin for Pete's sake (no, it's not legal tender... yet...). There's good reason for all the excitement. Don't get me wrong. It's just that to me, and I assume some others out there, the black/white thing is a non-issue.

I grew up in a time when a black man could become president, when a woman could become president. Heck, I grew up in a time when Oprah would have a shot at the presidency. So while I'm happy the country has finally gotten over the hump and elected a black man to the Whitehouse, I'm even more excited to see the back side of George W. Bush and what I hope will be the slow, grinding halt and eventual turn around of this country.

I suppose we all need something to be excited about. The grim reality is that the United States of America has an incredible uphill battle in front us. President Obama is inheriting a nation in a sad state of affairs with incredible inertia. We're all looking down the barrel of several more years of recession and conflict overseas, so by all mean, get excited and stay excited. This administration will be challenged like no other, and I hope he succeeds. Guess that's where I'm excited. At least now there's hope...

This guy had this idea to sell days wearing sponsored shirts for 2009. January 1st would be a buck, January 2nd $2.00 on through December 31st for a whopping $365.00. This idea is ridiculous, silly, even absurd, but it stands to net this guy a bit over $66,000.00!

For wearing shirts!

T-shirts, hoodies, sweatshirts, polos, whatever - shirts!

It's currently December of '08 and he's already sold out nearly half the year! There's only 1 day left for sale in the month of May and spots sold in June...

Not bad for a silly idea - IWearYourShirt.com...

Tell you what, I'll wear your gloves. For $66,000 I will wear your gloves exclusively (that means I won't wear anybody elses goloves), on cold days, for all of 2009. Put your logo on them things, embroider a slogan on those bad boys and I'll wear 'em. I'll even talk about your gloves right here on this blog. Heck, I'll post pictures of your gloves on my hands while I do Penis Heroic stuff.

Now go get your checkbook.

Connecticut Teacher - Spyware Trial - WTF!?

As endless campaigners for all that is right in the world, the fine folks at PenisHero.com have launched a new group at SpreadFirefox.com devoted to educating female strippers about the benefits of the Firefox web browser to their marketing efforts.

Strippers use social networking sites to build their fan bases. Sites like Myspace, Facebook and Xpeeps can offer a fountain of exposure for the savvy stripper, but most of these sites blow chunks in Internet Explorer. IE actually slows down the marketing efforts of hard working strippers. It is for this reason that we feel that strippers should give Firefox a try and join our campaign today (sorry, no guys)!

10 minutes in and they've already deleted our group. Sorry strippers, looks like the fine folks at Firefox would rather you stuck with IE...

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Red, white and blue and made in the USA - now that's patriotic!